Ten Tips for Tackling Tough Talks with Friends
Sometimes, dealing with friends doing dumb things is difficult. There’s nothing easy about it. Never has been. Never will be.
So here are the 10 tips for tackling tough talks with friends:
1. Don’t preach. Your friend needs a real friend, not a parent or a pastor.
2. Bring a friend. Maybe one or two other friends can help you out, but make sure everyone knows each other well.
3. Start with an affirmation. Before you bite into the thick meat of the situation, serve up something easier to swallow like how important the friendship is to you.
4. Make it clear that you’re not condemning, just showing concern.
5. Be specific. Don’t refer to vague situations. Present clear facts that are based on truth, not rumors or exaggerations.
6. Avoid words such as “always,” “never,” “every.” They don’t mean much.
7. Find a good place to meet that’ll be free of distractions.
8. Be wlling to own up to situations/conflicts/inconsistencies about your own life that your friend may bring up. Honesty is a good bridge builder.
9. Focus on your feelings rather than on your friend’s failures. He’s already going to feel awkward enough without someone beating it into him.
10. Be ready to go the distance with your friend. Everything probably won;’t change in one meeting. Be willing to meet again and again. Pray for your friend and ask God to give you the wisdom you need.
